Well, there’s the long version and the short one. I’ll go with the shortest version.
Most people have intentions to change their lives; and announce it to the whole world, or maybe just the diary. The thing is, turning those intentions into workable actions is really tough for most people. Most of those intentions remain just that, intentions.
I prefer to have goals, short term and long term goals. And I prefer to keep most of them private. But I can tell you about a few that I intend to keep for a lifetime.
1. I have a weird heart. He doesn’t always consult me on some decisions. For instance, my heart makes decisions with regards to whom I will love unconditionally, gifts, talents, flaws and imperfections, all.
When my heart chooses, I’ll love you no matter how stupid you act those two, seven times. Only if you hurt me deliberately, and my heart figures out could it be over between us. Usually the people I love, choose to love me back. Mum, Kiarie, Alexander, Sony, Joshua, Hirum, Paquis, Lydiah, KR, KW.
My long term goal is to make sure that I do my very best to be the kind of friend they deserve, true, sincere, without any pretences. I’ll be there when they need me, even if all I can give is a listening ear. But I’ll be there.
2. My heart, it can be harsh. There are people that it chooses to not to love unconditionally. And when that happens, all it takes is one thing to piss me off and have me shutting them out.
I’m not sorry that you might have been that person this year. Even if he does not talk to me always, I like to think that my mother raised my heart well. He is almost always right, so if he shuts you out, it means he figured out that you weren’t true.
I’ll try and listen to my heart more.
3. I have a weird mind. It remembers fear a little too clearly. I am afraid to be sick in public, to dive into the deep end of the pool just in case I get that muscle cramp that turned a water baby into an aquaphobic, to go out in case I get that horrid case of sunburn that had me getting treated for burns a while back…
I’ll be brave. I’ll dive into that deep end. It might take me a while to work up the courage. But I’ll be there.
4. My soul, too old, and too young. I love to learn new things. But sometimes I think that life doesn’t really have much that is new to teach me. It does. I agree. So I’ll learn, get better at writing code, get better at mastering Game Mathematics, get better at writing mysteries, get better at speaking and reading Spanish, get better at listening to the universe, get better at listening to My God…
I’ll learn. It might be daunting, but I’ll be there.
These are not intentions, these are actions I have been working at perfecting and will keep working on.
So don’t ask me about my New Year’s Resolutions. I don’t have any.